Your Identity is in Christ, Not a Relationship Title.

brooke-cagle-170002When it comes to the current state of relationship statuses, we live in a Facebook-fueled era of idolatry. What used to be just single or married has now become: single, in a relationship, engaged, married and everyone’s favorite, it’s complicated. Our relationship statuses, or lack thereof, follow us around like a shadow, eclipsing how we perceive ourselves and how others categorize us. Not only is this prevalent in the world, but it is even present in the church. Continue reading “Your Identity is in Christ, Not a Relationship Title.”

More Than a Feeling: Experiencing the Power of the Holy Spirit

frank-mckenna-269323The perception of power that Christians have is often cultivated by the world before ever walking in the freedom of Christ. The world teaches us that our measure of power is heavily tied to the outcome. Martin Luther King championed civil rights, Gandhi helped win India’s independence and Muhammed Ali was the best boxer of all time, but if you’re looking for the story about the guy who died trying to become the next great inventor, athlete, or blogger, you’re not going to find it. Given how we’ve been so conditioned to perceive what’s powerful, it’s not hard to understand why we feel so powerless as Christians.  Continue reading “More Than a Feeling: Experiencing the Power of the Holy Spirit”

3 Signs You’re in Infatuation, Not Love

photo-1466654813246-3435ccad1b1dIt’s like getting high. To be fair, I’ve never done any hard drugs to know the feeling first hand but I imagine getting high feels like those first few blissful months of a new dating relationship. The nightly conversations that go well into dawn, they’re the first person you think about when you wake up and even their annoying quirks are strangely endearing. The glorification and pursuit of this natural high makes millions of dollars at the box office, earns billions via dating apps and even has it’s own holiday. But before the beautiful, four-letter L word starts forming in your mind, ask yourself – is this love or just infatuation? In most cases, it’s the latter. Continue reading “3 Signs You’re in Infatuation, Not Love”

The 5 Stages of Realizing They’re Not “The One”

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We’ve all been there.

You meet a seemingly appropriate man or woman somewhere “meaningful” like at Whole Foods or Bible study. Your “meet-cute” could rival those of mid-1990s romantic comedies.

In the span of a whirlwind romance, you’ve planned your whole life together, only to have your fantasies start ripping at the seam when you realize well, you’re both imperfect human beings and maybe this time, you’re not supposed to work the rest of your lives out alongside one another. Perhaps they were the first to realize it.

Continue reading “The 5 Stages of Realizing They’re Not “The One””

How Idealistic Christian Dating Culture Has Screwed Our Chances at Love

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Well, kind of like the story of Isaac and Rebecca, when I first meet my future wife, I’ll just know.”

As I read these words on my message inbox, I gulped. The guy at the other end of this exchange was a handsome pastor in training with theological insight to rival Billy Graham’s. A 2016 Boaz if you will. And this is what he wrote me a few weeks before we were supposed to meet for the first time.

The weight of his sentence made my stomach clench into a knot because, buddy, I’m no Rebecca.

Continue reading “How Idealistic Christian Dating Culture Has Screwed Our Chances at Love”

How Christians Should Respond to People Who Doubt

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As I scrolled down my News feed this morning, an article titled 6 Things Christians Should Stop Saying to People Who Doubt caught my eye. While a heavy eye roll was my natural reaction to yet another article that seemed to paint Christians in a negative light, I couldn’t resist clicking. As my eyes traveled down the page, the feeling of conviction grew heavier and heavier. Not because it painted Christians in a negative light but because of how valid most of the author’s points were. Needless to say, I was guilty of every single one of them.

Continue reading “How Christians Should Respond to People Who Doubt”

Knowing You’re Loved by God is More Important Than Loving Yourself

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A year ago I wrote a blog post called Why Being Single in My 20’s is the Best Thing That Ever Happened to Me. It was a well-received piece about how I committed the third decade of my life to soul searching instead of jumping in and out of relationships like I witnessed many others my age doing. When my piece went viral, I received messages from young people all over the world about how my choice to pursue self-discovery and self-love over being in a relationship inspired them to do the same. I spent my 20’s traveling, chasing dreams and getting to know myself, kind of like Julia Roberts in Eat, Pray, Love minus the age and messy divorce. Continue reading “Knowing You’re Loved by God is More Important Than Loving Yourself”

This Is How Vulnerability Helps You Grow Emotionally

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Allowing ourselves to truly experience our emotions is a beautiful thing and is the first step towards becoming a well-rounded and emotionally balanced person.

As simple as it sounds, it’s not common practice. Especially with young people. Somewhere along the way, we were told to plaster on plastic smiles while posing next to a mountain for our profile pictures and pretend that everything was always okay. We were told that we should bury ourselves in the “hustle” or self-medicate with sex and booze until our feelings are stifled to the point we think we don’t need to face them. Yes, dealing with ourselves hurts.

Continue reading “This Is How Vulnerability Helps You Grow Emotionally”

The 5 Stages Of Realizing He’s Just Not That Into You

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We’ve all been there. You meet the seemingly perfect man at somewhere “meaningful” like Whole Foods or OkCupid and now you’ve planned your whole lives together, only to have your perfect fantasy start ripping at the seam. The agony of unrequited like can be quite treacherous so to assure you that you’re not alone, here are the four unavoidable and inevitable stages that we all go through (unless you’re one of the girls that couldn’t care less if a dude likes you or not, which in that case; I salute you strong warrior woman) when we realize; he’s just not that into us.

Stage One: Ignorant Bliss

Continue reading “The 5 Stages Of Realizing He’s Just Not That Into You”